It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen.

I gave up trying to effect a positive change on local culture long ago. Beliefs and habits are so firmly entrenched in our society, that trying to make people see the light (so to speak) has proved to be a daunting, nearly Herculean task.

It was enough to make me want to scream "Fools! I'll destroy you all!" as only an evil genius can.

Problem is, I'm only "middle-genius" and really not that evil, only cynical and misguided.

So, instead of building a remote Polar hideaway where I can amass a private army and build my Doomsday Device relatively uninterrupted, I settled on a Powerbook G3 "Lombard" and a length of black iron pipe instead. It seems so much more intimate than, say, a multi-terawatt satellite laser or something, and nothing beats the personal touch.

That said, in lieu of trying to effect a positive change, I've decided to make fun of society instead. And what better medium than the Internet?

-CJ